Let your love cover me
Like a pair of angel wings
You are my family,
You are my family…
“Family” – Pierce Pettis

We wrapped up the Bethlehem Skyline Christmas tour tonight in Wilmington, NC. It was a great run that was consistently well attended – most nights sold out! – by enthusiastic audiences who were eager not only to sing Christmas songs, but to explore the wonderful mystery of Emmanuel, God with us!

And God was with us on this tour. Christmas is a time that brings family and friends together, and the irony is not lost on us that while we were on the road to help others celebrate the season, we were on a bus far away from family and friends.  But together on the road, we became a kind of family of our own, and though I’m excited to be heading home shortly to be with my real family of Taya, Kipper, Jacob, and Gus, I’m also a bit sad to be saying goodbye to this family of Marc, Jay, Glenn, Jeremy, Lanae, Dave, Tim, Walt, and Rachel.  (Taya gets an honorary mention here, too, since she was out with us for the first part of the tour : -)

This is my 5th tour with Downhere and 3rd with Lanae, so there is an easy camaraderie with them where we can pick up where we last left off.  It feels like slipping into a well worn jacket that keeps me warm against the winter cold. In a way, it’s kind of like the way people all over the country get together for the holidays, but instead of Gramma’s house, it’s a tour bus (and a very nice one at that, thank you Jeremy Camp).

The tour bus becomes a kind of lifeboat and there’s a shared sense of being huddled together in a common storm called “life on the road”. Maybe because you know you’ll be forced to say goodbye at the end of a few weeks, it’s easy to fall into a reckless kind of intimacy where you find yourself more honest and transparent than you might otherwise be.

Whatever the reason, I find myself engaged in conversations I’m rarely brave enough to have anywhere else – about my hopes, fears, joys, doubts, as well as confessions of pettiness, insecurity, frustrations, failures, and the Grace that meets all of us in those places.

Oh, and I should also say that we laughed a lot, too. A lot! (“your mom” jokes were taken to a whole new level on this trip…)

And then there’s also the larger family of the fans who come to every show, sometimes bringing physical gifts, but always bringing the gift of their support and enthusiasm, without which we wouldn’t have anyone to share our ministries with.

All of these different kinds of “family” get-togethers were centered around a Christmas tour starring Emmanuel, God with us, who chose to be born into a human family himself, and in doing so made a way for us to be adopted into his family so that you and I “are no longer slaves, but God’s children; and since you are his children, he has made you also heirs…”

They say Christmas is for children, and it’s true – it’s for the child in all of us. The Christ child in the manger calls us to come to him as children ourselves and receive the gift of being called family.  I keep singing an old Pierce Pettis song to myself today:

“Let your love cover me, like a pair of angel’s wings… you are my family, you are my family…”

I will say goodbye to my road “family” tonight and with great eagerness I’ll race to Washington state to be with my real family who will receive me – Taya, Kipper, Jacob, Gus, and Taya’s extended family – and I will celebrate Christmas with them.  And I will find again Emmanuel, that God is with us, more often than not making himself known through the people he has put in my life – whether I’m on the road or in my living room.  I hope that you and I and the rest of us will remember that we are all made family because of the newborn King who came to show us the way back to the place where all families will one day gather: Home.

“Oh come let us adore him…”

Jason Gray’s wife, Taya
Has left to go home
But we’ve got a new World Vision girl
And she’s “Da Bomb!” (Adjust inflection…it’ll work, I swear!!)

Glenn’s family has come to visit
His wife and his two cute kids
We had bagels for lunch and
Tim Horton’s coffee and Timbits

So apparently people actually read
These crazy blogs we post
Which is really nice to hear
But not if they don’t know it’s a joke

A really nice lady
Read my “rookie” line
Then bought me my very OWN present
So I wasn’t left out during the meet, greet and sign!

It was so very nice
And I honestly feel blessed
I got a pair of warm fuzzy socks
And a scarf that is pink-ish red

We got a sweet surprise tonight
Glen’s sister, Krista came to say hi
We miss her very much you see
Cause she was on our tour last year this time

Tonight’s show was in a theater
And we had a lot of fun
Met some cool people
And now we’re off to Wisconsin (again, it’s all in the inflection!)

It’s Jeremy’s Birthday today,
The drummer of Downhere,
We celebrated with pirate patches
And gold rings in our ears

Jason Gray decided to demonstrate
Blowing balloons with his nose
Most everyone tried
And it was cool until they let go

The balloons began to fly
And as you could guess
Snot began to spray
As I squealed in distress

Styrofoam airplanes
Soared through the front lounge
We gave Jeremy princess stickers
And made him sport a sparkly birthday crown

Happy birthday Jeremy
Thanks for all that you’ve done
Keeping us organized
Without you, this tour wouldn’t run!

We broke open the ice cream
And watched a movie and ate
A great end to a long day
A nice birthday break!

Twelve shows down
Only three more to go
The tour is almost over
“OH NO!!!”

Well it’s time to hit the bunk
(It’s like a coffin but with a light)
Oh well, Merry Christmas to all
And to all a good night!

Lanae’ Hale

“Twenty minutes till load in!” are the first words I heard today, well, kind of. I was up till two o’clock last night doing laundry at home, and bus call at the Kroger was a quarter to seven so technically my day started then, but for the sake of sanity I will pretend that my day started at ten thirty when I heard the fateful call of load in. I am very aware of the constant inward conversation on tour. A stream of thoughts isolated by the repetition of the road, and interrupted by new people and new places. So I lay in my bunk trying to wake and praying for the grace to be kind, the grace to be nice even. Throughout my day I say things to myself and to God in tandem, or maybe vice versa. It’s not a performance being genuine. It’s a war. So I say things to myself like, “I kinda don’t care but Jesus does, so I guess I really do” or “I’m feeling lazy and I don’t want to lift that speaker, but Jesus was a servant…”, or even more telling on my nature, “this person doesn’t like me, do You like me?” And I guess that is ministry, asking for grace and acting for a will that is not your own. I hope I don’t sound bitter, I’m not. Just realistic of the expectation on my own part, and on the part of of God. So my prayer for tonight is, “Lord use me somehow”.

Post Show

Tonight was a good show, a sold-out attendance which is always encouraging! I believe God answered my prayers in many ways tonight. The blur and intensity of itinerate ministry makes it difficult to hold on to specific memories. As an emotional artist in some ways I navigate blind through these experiences, trusting the hand leading me through the smoke. I do remember praying with Jason Gray behind the stage before his set that Jesus would speak through him. I love singing the songs that God has given me to sing. Tonight I was very engaged in “Beggar Who Gives Alms” I think in my pre show blog I was really already thinking along those lines. I really like that God takes our offerings in life and makes them good and it was a good day and an answer to prayer.

But the one cool thing about playing to a smaller audience is the intimate setting we can all enjoy. Sure, it generally means a little more work for us as there’s not as much energy in the room for us to feed off of, but I talked with a number of people last night who really enjoyed themselves despite the small crowd and were very appreciative. So – cold or no cold, snow or no snow… the show much go on.

Pray for Lanae’ – her voice is starting to give her troubles and she’s concerned about getting laryngitis again (I guess it was right after this tour last year that she got sick and it took quite a while for her to recover completely).

Other trivial notes about yesterday: the green room had a ton of old-school pinball and arcade games, so the guys were able to relive their youth for a while. And Roland the clerk at the hotel where we showered in the afternoon ended up bringing his family to the show, so that was neat. And of course, what is a tour with Jason and Taya Gray without at least one viewing of “Nacho Libre”? What a way to end the night…

One more Nebraska show tonight (Omaha) and then we’re headed back east – Kansas and Missouri before a long-awaited day at home. Thanks to all who have come and joined with us so far on this tour – we’re looking forward to seeing the rest of you!

The day before that, as Marc wrote, we had a day off from the tour in Greenville, IL but Lanae and I went to Greenville college to speak to a class about the craft of songwriting followed by a concert that night in their campus coffee shop.  There are few things that light me up like talking about songwriting and I had a good time exploring the magic and mystery of the songs we love.  Jorge Casas, bassist for Miami Sound Machine is the professor of the class and so I also got to profess my own highschool crush that I carried for Gloria Estefan.  He told me he’d let her know.  I can’t wait.

That night, some students opened up the evening for us – something that more often than not can be a mini-disaster but in this case was absolutely delightful.  Then Lanae and I were up and I opened our artist in the round kind of concert where Lanae and I went back and forth with songs throughout the evening.  If you’ve not heard Lanae, she has an airy and enchanting voice that soars gracefully over and in and around the sweet little melodies she creates.  I knew they’d love her, and that’s why I elected to go first so I’d at least have a shot at having the spotlight for a moment before she stole it.  I unfortunately started to lose my voice about three songs in, and that’s exactly the kind of predicament you DON’T want to happen when you’re singing with Lanae!  But in spite of that and some technical difficulties that dogged us for part of the night, we both had a great time.  The students were very generous and gave us their attention and even their hearts at times as we wove our songs together to tell the story of God’s goodness in our lives, rounding out the evening with a Christmas sing along.

I suspect that I’m approaching the age where my songs connect better to people who’ve had life experiences similar to mine – I definitely felt like the old guy in the room. But as I said the students were great hearted and generous.  It was a delight after each of my songs to sit and listen to Lanae sing and watch as her voice lit up the room.  It was fun to share the stage with her.

At the end of the evening, another student got up to close the night, and it’s been a long time since I’ve seen such raw talent – both vocally and in terms of presence/confidence.  Taya and I even bought her home-made CD.  I hope to hear more from Steph Plant in the future (check her out on MySpace)

In the songwriting class, I shared a quote from the movie about C.S. Lewis called “Shadowlands” where a student tells Lewis that “we read books to know we’re not alone.”  I believe the same can be said of music, and that the great privilege of being a music maker is that we get to give voice to the human experience – joy, pain, hope, all of it – and that we get to write songs that take the hands of those who will listen and lead them through the brambles, deserts, winters, and spring times of their own emotions and experiences.  For those who have listened to my songs and journeyed with them awhile, thank you for that great privilege.

Originally, our day off was going to be in Chicago – a city we’re surprisingly unfamiliar with considering how often we play in this area. I was kinda looking forward to that. But Centricity decided to book Jason and Lanae to play at Greenville College instead of everyone sitting around doing “nothing”. So, since we’re all traveling on the same bus (thank you Jeremy Camp) we ended up spending the day getting to know Robyn Florian who hosted us at her home in Greenville. The big plus there was getting to do laundry, and I think almost everyone took advantage of the facilities. My afternoon was spent transferring whites and darks from one machine to the other, and ironing my dress shirts… and watching Lord Of The Rings: Return Of The King. Always a good time.

Robyn was a delight to get to know. She’s the talent booker for Agape Fest, among other things. Agape is one of the older Christian music festivals in the US, dating back to 1977, and is almost entirely run by Greenville College students . We will be performing there this summer for the first time, sharing the stage with Sanctus Real and David Crowder… so Robyn tells me. Looking forward to that. Robyn took great care of us, and knew exactly what a band needs for a day of relaxing from tour, having herself been involved in many aspects of the music biz, starting out as the merchandise girl for Whiteheart back in the day. Zang!

The evening was topped off with a trip to Wal-Mart, where we did a little Christmas shopping. Well, for some of us… I bought a laundry bag for my suitcase. Hot dang. You can tell how small a town is by how far the drive to Wal-Mart is. From Greenville? About 20 minutes. You be the judge.

Marc

The road noise was humming
As we drove in good cheer
Label mates reuniting
For the Bethlehem Skyline Tour was FINALLY here!

We kicked off the Tour
With a Nashville Bang!
Not sure if it was a good thing
But we did it all the same!

We kissed all our loved ones
Then loaded the bus
Prayed a quick prayer
For it was Missouri or bust!

All snug in our bunks
We tossed and we turned
For cheese and crackers (ingested at 2 A.M.)
Can make the tummy burn

In the morning we woke
Fighting cold germs already
We unloaded the trailer
As Taya Gray blew colorful nose confetti

We sung and we played
Our Instruments with care
We wore Santa hats on stage
And met everyone there

We reloaded the trailer
And away we went
To the Gray’s home state,
Minnesota, which was a relatively short trip

We arose to COLD weather
And of course, I almost died
But we got to see Jason and Taya’s kids
And get adjusted by a chiropractor guy

Other than getting walked in on
By a name I refrain to mention
The show went great and
A nice lady gave me a beautiful pair of warm mittens ☺

We left the state having enjoyed our stay
With Christmas cookies
And my first time seeing frozen lakes
(And a story of Jason Gray
Wiping out on roller blades)… HILARIOUS!

We got to open Santa’s red bag
(Only because Downhere’s fans are SO RAD!)
and partake in their goodies
(can’t wait till I’m no rookie!)

Wisconsin is day four
And I don’t like cold weather anymore!
BUT on stage I got to wear antlers with bells
Cause I took the dare before anyone else!

I got to meet a real nice girl
Who hand drew my picture
it looks better than real life
(that’s the embarrassing kicker!)

I got a stocking from a fan
And then felt pretty cool
Until I looked around and saw
Everyone else had one too! ☺

So we’ve loaded up the bus again
Orange Cheese curds in sight
And now we’re heading to Chicago
So Merry Christmas to all and to all a goodnight!

Love,
Lanae’ Hale

It was a day filled with family and friends. We had some friends come up from Wisconsin, saw some of our label “family” as well as some blood family (Jason Gray is from the area so we got to hang out with his parents and boys for the day). Oh – and cookies… I can’t tell you how many cookies I saw laid out for the cookie social that happened before the show started, but there were a lot (I’m not going to tell you how many of those cookies I ate either…).

Lanae has the story of the day, however. The restrooms backstage didn’t have locks for some reason, so we had a conversation as a team before load-in that day warning everyone about them. One particular individual even suggested instituting a “knock first” policy which everyone gladly accepted. Well, wouldn’t you know it… it was THAT very individual who neglected to knock and walked in on Lanae as she was going to the bathroom. Lanae took it like a champ – what can you do in that situation?? – and the unnamed individual was sufficiently embarrassed… and we all got a good laugh out of it.

So there you have it – now I’ve got to run and get ready to play tonight’s show in Weston, WI – looks like I’ve got about 15 minutes to get ready. You’ll hear from Lanae tomorrow on how Wisconsin went, but I’ll steal her thunder here a little bit by saying it’s a packed house in there tonight – should be a lot of fun!

Jeremy

It’s kind of like the national anthem. I got asked to sing it at a ball game a number of years ago, and it’s a song that you think you know until you’re not singing along with everybody else. So in my case, there were some extended pauses after each line as I tried to remember the lyrics in a panic. As I recall, I sang one part like this:

“The bombs bursting in air….
And the bombs bursting in air”

Christmas songs are a little like that for me. I can sing along with them all day long, but when I’m in charge of leading them, it requires supernatural feats of mental athleticism to recall the right lyrics.

But it’s worth it because these songs are so rich and it’s truly an honor to get to sing such classic, beloved songs. So after another little rehearsal before the concert at the church in Osage Beach, MO, I’m feeling a little more at home with the lyrics again and am more at ease – it’s becoming less like the math of remembering words, chords, and cues, and more from the heart. By the time we took the stage, the songs started to feel like second nature again.

The other challenging thing with a Christmas tour is the perceived expectation of the audience. Sometimes it feels like some people come to a Christmas show to hear nice Christmas songs as a kind of escapism – and who can blame them with the daily news and pressures and concerns… Sometimes you just want a break from it all and sing “Silver Bells”.

The conflict for a guy like me comes when my conviction to call people to deeper engagement bumps up against other people’s desire for escapism. My struggle has always been to walk that line of giving people what I imagine they need vs. giving them what they want, or trying to package what they need in a way that looks like something they might want. Perhaps it’s presumptuous of me to imagine I know what people need, but ultimately I’m just trying to be faithful to my calling. And my experience has been that if you give the people what they need, they’ll thank you for it. It’s kind of like how I feel after eating a salad. I didn’t want it at first, but afterwards, I’m so grateful I didn’t order the greasy cheeseburger. Most times anyway…

So when a guy like me is trying to put together a Christmas show, it’s hard to choose the right kind of songs that feel Christmas-y enough and that might also make a for a ministry moment that embodies what Christmas is really all about. I’ve personally been struggling over my set of songs on this tour – asking myself over and over about which songs best serve our purposes, spending hours trying out different combinations, agonizing, etc.

God is good and in his kindness sees fit to speak into my insecurities. He doesn’t have to, of course, since it isn’t all about me – it’s about and for Him. And yet in his generosity, he’s sent people both nights who have come to me after the show saying what blessed them most about my set, and both nights they’ve named the very things in my set that I was the most unsure of – the parts that when I walked off stage I determined to change them for the next night. Shows what I know, I guess. These comments are like little signposts to reassure me that He is leading.

And who knows? Each night might be different. I’m praying for the sensitivity and the grace to be led each night. After all, I’m less interested in bringing my songs each night than I am in telling the story of God’s goodness.

It’s a fun tour – we’re seeing a lot of old friends and every night the concert changes just a little bit as we discover ways to make it better. I love that it’s ever evolving and isn’t a static thing. It keeps us on our toes and attuned to the leading of the Holy Spirit.

I look forward to our concert tonight – we’re in Minnesota so our kids will be there! It’s been 6 days since we dropped them off at grampa and gramma’s and Taya and I are so excited to see them.

If you’re in Minnesota, we’re excited to see you too! Hope you can make it out.

Blessings and Merry Christmas,

Jason Gray

Glenn